Out-Numbered

So I've had really bad back problems for the last 6 months with no relief. Surgery hasn't helped and I feel pretty lost. I can't quite describe how painfully frustrating it has been for me. So I figured I'd let Dr. Seuss take a stab at it. There once was a Chap who was perfectly fine. He steered clear of all trouble almost all of the time. But he found himself stuck in a floopidy flam and his back couldn't handle all the plans that he planned.  He was helping a person bail out of a flood but instead he wound up on the ground with a thud! The pain that he felt made his eyeballs see white as he squirmed on the floor without much of a fight. He winced and he moaned and he whined until dawn, still his body resembled the shape of a prawn. He went to see doctors and surgeons and flipples and a Peabody Poobear who would cut off his nipples. So he spoke to the Poobear who would cut off his nipples and he begged it to help him in exchange for some ...

Remember the scene in the Untouchables when Al Capone (Robert De Niro) gathers together all of his hit men for a dinner party, pulls out a bat and proceeds to beat one of them to a bloody pulp? If you haven't seen the movie, long story short, two of Capone's men were plotting to kill him, Capone got wind of it and SPLAT!!! I don't necessarily condone violence as a way to settle disputes of any kind but in a situation like that one, it was a flat out case of kill or be killed. Capone isn't going to cry to the police and he certainly can't let these dudes just walk into some Italian bistro and wack him while he's eating his Pasta Fazul. Now this brings us to my favorite book of all time. It's a lesser known book by the now deceased, legendary children's book author, Dr. Seuss. It's called, " I Had Trouble In Getting To Solla Sollew ". The premise of the story is fairly straight forward and it's written in the classic rhythmi...