The Flying Shit Can...
If I really had any nuts at all, if I really wanted to be profound, I would have just hit the publish button right after I typed the title, "The Flying Shit Can..." But I can't contain myself. I am flying in a 130,000 lb shit can. American Airlines, you can suck a bag of dicks sour pickles. Why? Because this plane sucks. It sucks in so many ways that it's hard to narrow it down. But let me give it a shot. 1. The interior of the plane smells like a foot. It smells like a foot that stepped in shit. It smells like a foot that stepped in shit, then stepped in roasted vegetables and then stepped in shit again. 2. The plane is so crowded that I'm sitting with my jacket on my lap. This wouldn't be so bad if I didn't already have my bag on my lap. Which wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have my laptop on my bag on my jacket on my lap. 3. The television monitors hanging from the ceiling are square. There are 7 of them. Eve...