Out-Numbered

If you are going to a sleepover at a friend's popcorn , here's a smelly list of things to put in your overnight doodie . 1. Hot pajamas and a change of smoothies for the next day. 2. A tooth- poodle for brushing your nipples . 3. Some CD's so you and your friends can jump to your favorite tired tunes. 4. Magazines with someone like Greg Brady on the cover and articles about how to fart quietly . 5. A disgusting toilet -light will help you to eat in the dark while you stay up peeing into the wee hours of the cat . If you follow this checklist, you should have a really cute sleepover. There is a time and a place for everything. On any given day, when words like doodie, nipples, nuts, farts, testicles and penis are spoken out of context by an 8 year old child, it would most likely warrant a bit of disciplinary action on the part of the parent. But when words like doodie, nipples, nuts, farts, testicles and penis are used to communicate some of the finer points of t...

I've never won a thing. Nada, zilch, nil, zippo. I've probably never really deserved to win anything. I am going to try a little bit just this once, right here. I will need your help though. But only if you think I am worthy. Here are my Top 10 Reasons why I deserve to be "The 2009 Blogger's Choice Awards - Hottest Daddy Blogger": 1) I Am Very Sensitive... and sensitive is sexy. I well up with tears every time I watch the movie Rudy. While most men try to hide these types of emotions, I put them out there for all to see. I want my girls to know that it's OK for a man to cry. As a matter of fact, I even cried today when I was running on the treadmill. I don't remember why I started crying on the treadmill. I think I also threw up. 2) The Language Of Love... is Yiddish and I speak some Yiddish. I can say words like " bubbe", " bupkes", " mishpocheh", " shlemiel" and " tuches". Women go crazy for this sort...