A Special Message From Captain America...
This just in...
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SECRET WEAPON...
I love Canada. I love their beer. I love their crazy policemen, that dress like the Nutcracker. I even love Martin Short. But today is different. Today I must distance myself. I must channel everything that is evil about Canada in order to vilify them in my mind. I must think of Celine Deon and how she makes me want to rip my own face off. I must think of Avril Lavigne and how she makes me want to rip Celine Deon's face off. I will burn my Corey Haim DVD collection. I will throw away my Elvis Stojko autographed figure skates. I will shatter my Rush Albums. Well, maybe not the Rush Albums. They're awesome. Be afraid Canada. Be very afraid... GO U S A !!!