Do They Eat Chili In Chile?

Fact: I Love My Kids.

Fact: I don't know what the fuck they are talking about.

In the car on the way to school...

7 Year Old - It's so sunny out. Why do I have to wear my jacket?

Out-Numbered - Because I said so.

7 Year Old - That's not a real reason.

Out-Numbered - To me it is.

7 Year Old - Seriously Dad. Why do I have to wear my jacket?

3 Year Old - Yeah. Seriously.

Out-Numbered - You. Zip it.

3 Year Old - Sorry.

Out-Numbered - You have to wear your jackets because it's chilly out today.

7 Year Old - Did you know they had an earthquake in Chile?

Out-Numbered - What?

7 Year Old - They had an earthquake in Chile.

Out-Numbered - What does that have to do with your jacket?

7 Year Old - Do they eat Chili in Chile?

Out-Numbered - What are you talking about?

7 Year Old - Chile is too spicy for me.

3 Year Old - I don't like spicy.

Out-Numbered - What are you guys talking about?

3 Year Old - Daddy?

Out-Numbered - Yes.

3 Year Old - What are you drinking?

Out-Numbered - An energy drink.

3 Year Old - What's it called?

Out-Numbered - It's called Monster.

3 Year Old - Is it a good Monster or a bad Monster?

7 Year Old - It's not that kind of monster.

Out-Numbered - It's just a silly name, baby.

3 Year Old - But is it a good monster?

7 Year Old - She's an idiot.

Out-Numbered - Stop that. She's not an idiot.

3 Year Old - I'm not an idiot.

7 Year Old - Yes you are.

Out-Numbered - ENOUGH! It's not a monster, baby. It's just a drink.

3 Year Old - But what if it's a bad monster?

7 Year Old - IT'S NOT A MONSTER! IT'S A DRINK!

Out-Numbered - I SAID ENOUGH!

3 Year Old - What would you do if it's a bad monster?

Out-Numbered - I would beat it up.

7 Year Old - Dad, you said it's not a real monster.

Out-Numbered - It's not. I'm just saying it hypothetically.

7 Year Old - What's hypothetically?

Out-Numbered - Google it.

7 Year Old - Dad.

3 Year Old - What's Google?

Out-Numbered - Let's listen to music...

Comments

  1. AnonymousMarch 19, 2010 at 8:09 AM

    why do I feel like this will be a conversation in the future? I guess because my daughters are 6 snd 2.

    BTW, shared this on Facebook.

    ReplyDelete
  2. MaxMarch 19, 2010 at 8:24 AM

    Well do they? Do they eat chili in Chile?

    LOL Too funny.

    ReplyDelete
  3. My Bottle's Up!March 19, 2010 at 8:56 AM

    i love them.

    ReplyDelete
  4. DebMarch 19, 2010 at 9:07 AM

    -->I asked my step-daughter when she was six why our dog had fur. She said, "DUH DEB, if she didn't she'd be naked!"

    ReplyDelete
  5. MikeMarch 19, 2010 at 9:13 AM

    classic

    ReplyDelete
  6. Scary MommyMarch 19, 2010 at 10:34 AM

    That could have been in my car.

    My four year old must asks "why" a million times a day. He's so adorable, it kills me, but sometimes? He just needs to shut up!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. CormacMarch 19, 2010 at 10:49 AM

    "It's so sunny out. Why do I have to wear my jacket?"

    My 4-year old has totally taken against wearing her coat. "Dad, it's not THAT cold outside, can I go out without my jacket?" I usually say "ok", surely she's the one who knows best if she's cold. Her mother disagrees, and given her (the 4-year old's) record on knowing whether she's hungry or tired or in need of the toilet I'll have to concede she's probably right.

    I still say "ok" though, usually

    ReplyDelete
  8. Scott S.March 19, 2010 at 11:10 AM

    Oh shit. Thanks god we I dont have the kids in my car by myself. I would punch myself in the face after a conversation like that.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Barbara EhrentreuMarch 19, 2010 at 12:02 PM

    Great post again!!! Ah for the days when that was a conversation for my daughters. Now they are grown they get into the most ridiculous arguments ever. Sometimes I get involved if they are too crazy! But think of the creativity of this conversation with your kids.:) I mean, "Do They Eat Chili in Chile?" sounds like a great title for kids book. As an author I would love to use it.:) Your kids sound so adorable I long for those innocent moments when we explored topics that seemed to be something everyone knew. It's when you hear those words coming out of kids' mouths that you realize that you assume way too much about what they are understanding when you are talking to them. I especially loved your 3 year old who kept wanting to know if it was a good or bad monster. Monsters are important at that age.:)

    ReplyDelete
  10. JaysDadMarch 19, 2010 at 12:10 PM

    This reminds me of the time when I picked you and Michael up from Merrick and we were driving back to Norwalk, CT. for the weekend with Dad and Monique. On the way you saw a sign that said Mianus and you asked, Where's Mi-anus and I said it's your tushy! And you said, huh? Then there's the time you asked me where's Uranus and I said again, it's my Tushy! Memories! I wonder if you remembered that? Classic!

    ReplyDelete
  11. SabreenaMarch 19, 2010 at 12:29 PM

    Thank God for the in car DVD players. I can pick and choose when I want a little car convo. Since I spend my entire day with the kids I usually opt for the movies. The days I don't play a movie sound much like yours except more garbled and undiscernable because my boys are 2 and 3 and are still smoothing out the edges on their speech.

    ReplyDelete
  12. PrttyBrdMarch 19, 2010 at 12:45 PM

    I'm not sure which amused me more the post or the comments.

    Okay, maybe your Dad's post wins. I have four boys and the little ones just learned "anus" from the oldest, who btw is in middle school and can't stop laughing at the word "balls".

    Hubby doesn't help, as he is so amused with this that he says balls any chance he gets. We took the little one bowling while the others where at school, the same day we had spaghetti and meatballs for dinner (my bad. Hubby spent all of dinner getting the little one to excitedly talk about the biggest, heaviest balls ever that he needed to roll. But it's okay because he is big and strong. Strong enough to roll big giant balls. Oh, btw son how are your meat-balls.

    In my house, I am the one out numbered:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. ChrisMarch 19, 2010 at 2:43 PM

    Did you listen to the Red Hot Chili Peppers? Then you could have taught the girls the word "ironic" among others.

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousMarch 19, 2010 at 4:31 PM

    do kids know what a dictionary is? or has google supplanted dictionaries like computers supplanted typewriters? omg, google IS computers. computers are taking over the world.

    ReplyDelete
  15. LisaMarch 19, 2010 at 5:12 PM

    Oh, you just wait until they are tweens and they can take your words and twist them to use them against you! You will beg for days like this, my friend. :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Sarah FaderMarch 19, 2010 at 7:33 PM

    Fantastic. I bet they do eat chili in Chile. For me the "monster" in energy drinks is a bad one. He makes me crazy.

    ReplyDelete
  17. LoJoMarch 19, 2010 at 8:18 PM

    Who's on first?

    ReplyDelete
  18. MegMarch 20, 2010 at 5:45 AM

    Dad.

    Ha! Just kills me reading this stuff :) You can just hear the attitude behind it.

    ReplyDelete
  19. MrsBlogAlotMarch 20, 2010 at 11:03 PM

    Do monsters have to wear jackets?

    teeeheeee!


    Well do they?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Organic Motherhood with Cool WhipMarch 21, 2010 at 12:57 AM

    Just for the record...they do not eat chili in Chile. I spent half a year there and was astounded to find this out. Chileans not so excited about spicy I quickly discovered after attempting to feed my host family spicy burritos....oops. Anyway, also wanted to say that I think you are hilarious. Just found you on Mrs. Blogalot. Following/stalking starts now. Will be back again soon.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Sarah, Goon Squad SarahMarch 22, 2010 at 10:06 AM

    My whole life is exactly like this.

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Invisible SeductressMarch 22, 2010 at 12:25 PM

    PERFECT POST!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  23. UnknownMarch 22, 2010 at 3:39 PM

    Oh my gosh. My life, too, bears an eerie resemblance to this. Most recently, my 8-year-old and his friend got into an argument over whether Kung Fu or wrestling was "the coolest in the world." Somehow, we ended up at Venus fly traps, and they were fighting. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Otter ThomasMarch 22, 2010 at 5:08 PM

    It's like a game. How many questions before Dad says "Let's listen to music." I think you did well today.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Listen Up, MoFos!March 22, 2010 at 7:15 PM

    We don't eat chili in Chile, but we do eat very spicy chili peppers called "aji". I thought your daughter would like to know :)

    I have only one daughter who is three, but this reminded me of me and my sister and years later, my two brothers. So funny!

    ReplyDelete
  26. MomMarch 22, 2010 at 9:06 PM

    OOOOOOOOOOOH!
    This is the best medicine for the day!
    I can't stop laughing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I'm going to read this one for the rest of the week.
    Quick...
    write another one. I'm sure there's more where this came from.

    ReplyDelete
  27. ronnibunny72March 24, 2010 at 6:42 AM

    i love u all!

    ReplyDelete
  28. Mary@Holy MackerelApril 2, 2010 at 1:26 PM

    Oh god, we have those conversations ALL.THE.TIME. And that is why I am insane.

    ReplyDelete
  29. ZakaryApril 7, 2010 at 2:51 PM

    We have the same conversation regarding shorts vs. pants. DAILY.

    Too funny.

    ReplyDelete
  30. SurprisedMomApril 14, 2010 at 8:35 PM

    This is a fantastically, funny post! It only get worse when girls get to be teens. My husband calls it "Twin Talk."

    ReplyDelete
  31. MelOctober 7, 2010 at 8:46 AM

    Haha, very funny. My kids are the same. :-)

    ReplyDelete

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