Hello. How May I Not Help You?

The other day, I had the most absurd, maddening and yet extremely hilarious exchange with an online customer service representative.

Here is the product I was trying to purchase as it appeared on the website:

Red Bamboo Rug (3' Octagonal)



















My questions were: What are the measurements of the rug? And what does 3' Octagonal mean?

Here is my exchange with the online customer service representative, who is clearly not named Palmer:

Palmer: Hi, my name is Palmer. How may I help you?

Visitor: Hi Palmer.

Visitor: I'm looking for the measurements of a rug.


Visitor: It says 3' Octagonal and I don't know what that means.

Palmer: It is 'Red Bamboo Rug (3' Octagonal)', correct?

Visitor: yes

Palmer: Since this rug comes with the thickness of 0.125 inch it is considered as 8 edged rug hence it is called Octagonal Rug.

Visitor: OK

Visitor: What are the dimensions though?

Palmer: Dimension of the rug is 3 ft. octagonal.

Visitor: I still don't understand. What is the length and what is the width?

Palmer: It comes with the dimensions of Height: 3 Width: 3Length: 36.

Visitor: 36 inches long and 3 feet wide?

Palmer: Yes, that is correct.

Visitor: But wait. If it's 36" long and 3' wide, wouldn't that make it a square? Because the rug is in the shape of a rectangle.

Visitor: And how could the height be 3 feet if it's a rug?

Palmer: I am sorry, I am unable to locate the information on the product page.

Palmer: I apologize for the inconvenience that caused to you.

Visitor: Where did you get Height: 3 Width: 3Length: 36 from?

Palmer: It is described in Product Description page.

Visitor: Can you send me a link to that page?

Visitor: I don't see a product description page with that information.

Palmer: I am sorry, we do not have an option to send that link.

Palmer: Thanks for visiting our website Have a nice day.

Palmer has disconnected.

Of course I went ahead and ordered the rug. I had to have answers and I certainly wasn't getting them from "Palmer".

This is what was delivered to me:


















Of course! Now this makes total sense to me.

Thanks "Palmer"!

*Wraps self in 3' Octagonal Red Bamboo Rug and Jumps through closed window*...

Comments

  1. AngelaJuly 12, 2011 at 11:35 PM

    What? You don't like your Stop sign rug? Perhaps you can send it to Palmer as a gift for being such a super terrific Customer Service representative.

    ReplyDelete
  2. DevraJuly 13, 2011 at 12:03 AM

    Which site? Because I'm actually trying to find a 5' octagonal bamboo rug for our kitchen.

    Although I still don't see how that rug is 3' high. That would be difficult to put furniture upon.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jenni Chiu @MommyNaniBooboo July 13, 2011 at 10:41 AM

    Online customer service is mostly someone puking up the info in the product page or q and a page. They should open all convos with "I'm sure I won't be able to help because they equip me with no knowledge, and you care about it way more than I do."
    Um... really like the rug, though. Hope it broke your fall out of the window.

    ReplyDelete
  4. jayslilsisJuly 13, 2011 at 11:05 AM

    HAHAHA- the site pic is definitely misleading. Their web team needs a better manager/director.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Steve BaileyJuly 13, 2011 at 3:42 PM

    Hahaha! Damn you Palmer!! You win again. You always do!

    ReplyDelete
  6. PilatesJuly 14, 2011 at 5:58 AM

    ROFL Palmer!! That was a funny conversation...Sometimes I get pissed during the conversation with the customer and I simply disconnect the chat.. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  7. emmaJuly 14, 2011 at 7:28 PM

    Oh my god, you are SO DANGEROUS to read while at work. I end up cackling and snorting and scaring half my co-workers and then they don't get it. *sigh* I adore your voice.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousJuly 14, 2011 at 8:46 PM

    I give you credit for hanging in there as long as you did.

    ReplyDelete
  9. BenJuly 15, 2011 at 5:21 AM

    Hahaha i can't stop laughing after reading your conversation with that representative.. Absolutly priceless!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Heather @ Creative Family MomentsJuly 19, 2011 at 9:03 PM

    Ha! This made my day!

    ReplyDelete
  11. That gentleman's ladyJuly 23, 2011 at 11:16 AM

    Hah. Love it!

    I recently had a customer service person say to me on the phone "Thank you for the confusion."

    Props to them for speakin' their mind, but I think that slipped out on accident.

    ReplyDelete
  12. JaysDadJuly 24, 2011 at 12:51 PM

    Are you sure his name wasn't "Betty"!

    ReplyDelete
  13. AzzJuly 25, 2011 at 2:58 AM

    Haha! An octagonal rug! That's hilarious =D

    ReplyDelete
  14. jessAugust 8, 2011 at 8:10 PM

    If you put that in front of your door, does it function as a doormat that stops unwanted visitors before they enter your house? Because I don't know why they wouldn't market that aspect. I'd buy one.

    ReplyDelete
  15. AnonymousSeptember 6, 2011 at 8:16 PM

    PLease keep flying Delta. I'd find you too funny not to torment, so if you fly a competitor and spot a crew member wearing a pair of geranium pink high tops ... walk away, just walk away.

    ReplyDelete
  16. KarenOctober 18, 2011 at 11:12 PM

    Love it! I get this all the time the few times I dare to ask questions at the hardware store. The store worker invariably looks at the product label and reads it out loud to me. Now, if it were James Earl Jones reading the label, it might be entertaining... but no aspiring voice-over actors at my local store... A shame...

    Love your blog!

    Best, Karen
    http://ablogdayafternoon-karen.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete

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